Place Mat's
by Winged-Wolf13
Summary: Xigbar seeks revenge in the form of a small camera; Zexion and Lexaeus are his victim's. Drabble; Humor; Bit of Violence.


Heh, I think a lot more could have been done with this, but I dunno. Tell me what you think on reviews.

**Warnings: **Yaoi, as in male kissing. Swearing. Tad bit of Violence.

**Disclaimer:** Kingdom Hearts does not belong to me in any way, shape, or fashion. Be glad, too. Be glad... :]

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Xigbar was definitely someone you did _not _want to mess with.

Typically he was an alright guy. Laid-back, witty, and quite funny were a few words his good friends would use to describe him.

However, he could be terribly sarcastic and cocky. And it would be a cold day in hell when he was afraid to express his opinion. No. II was also very fond of eavesdropping. Which is quite easy with the ability to defy reality, distort space, and walk upon ceiling's.

Which, by the way, was where he resided at this very moment. Xigbar was hunkered down, peering into the nearby living room. Inside was the dainty Zexion, and the hulking Lexaeus. In Xigbar's scarred and tanned hands perched a delicate little camera. In Zexion's hands was a well read and very dog-eared book. And in Lexaeus's hands? In his hands was the tiny little Zexion. His small stature all the more palpable against the Silent Hero's figure.

The two were curled up on the pristine white couch, cast in the light of the TV. Which was currently showing a commercial for No. XIII's favorite Sea Salt Ice Cream. Lexaeus's arms were twined loosely around Zexion as the silver-haired man flipped pages absentmindedly. Most likely more focused on the man beneath him rather than the novel in his bony hands.

Xigbar had been in a fight with dear little Zexion a few day's ago. The man had said at one point something along the lines of _"--Pompous, arrogant old man that deserves no less than the gray hair hitched back in your pony-tail."_

And _no one _called Xigbar out on his graying head of hair. After all, it wasn't like he could help it. And Zexion was certainly not one to talk. What color was his damn hair anyway? Silver counted as gray right? Right!?

A bead of sweat trickled and danced down his face, tickling his rugged skin and dropping to the white-washed floors several meters below. He froze for a moment, wondering whether or not Zexion's hearing was as good as his sense of smell. This was probably as close as he could get without being detected after all.

As he hitched the camera up to his eye (Demyx had explained all the inner-workings and buttons to him earlier that day) and zoomed in on the oblivious couple, he watched keenly as Lexaeus stroked that resplendent hair. Even from here Xigbar thought he could see his reflection in it. How the man kept it so bright and clean was a mystery to No. II.. His own hair was frizzy, dry, and brittle. Although his little Cloaked Schemer was quite fond of it, nonetheless.

Xigbar smiled to himself as he steadied his hand-- and, what was this? Zexion had leaned his head back to plant a kiss on Lexaeus' cheek. No. II swore to himself, wishing he'd caught it. He sat motionless, waiting... Surely Rock-Head would want another? And much to his delight, Lady Luck was on his side.

A moment later the flash went off and Xigbar was scurrying into a portal; No. V and No. VI completely unaware that their affectionate gestures were now stowed away forever in the memory banks of a plastic little device.

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"What. Is. This!?" Zexion ground out the next evening at dinner. He had walked in silence to the large dining table, his head hung and his hair flopping about his face. He was oblivious to the many stares and snigger's and chuckles he was receiving. As he sat however, he couldn't help but notice the new place mats.

He had glanced at his own fleetingly, reaching for the soup-- and then snapped back to the mat. Usually they adorned absolutely no design. They matched the tables perfectly that way, and Xemnas was a bit of a stickler for the color white. He said it made him feel _regel_. But alas, today two figures were exchanging a tender kiss on that mat. And upon closer examination, Zexion realized they two were men. Not only that, but it was none other than himself and Lexaeus.

At his side the Silent Hero stared coldly at his plate, glaring daggers at the porceling surface. No doubt reprimanding himself for letting his relationship with little No. VI get out.

Zexion tore the mat from beneath his empty bowl and shredded it. "Who did this!?" He snarled, his face that of a primal beast snarling and growling, hungry for blood. Little plastic bits of place mat fluttered to the ground, piling around his gleaming black shoes. He wouldn't hesitate to rip out Larxene's jugular if it was her doing. But the cocky little chuckle that reached his ears was not one he had expected.

"Poor 'lil Zexion. Shouldn't have trash-talked my hair, my boy. Alas, justice has been served." He smoothed back his hair and grinned an incredibly wolfish grin.

Zexion's jaw dropped and he would have blushed fiercely. Nobodies were incapable of blushing though, so he settled for just a jaw drop. That was dramatic, right?

Sure, he remembered saying something about the older man's hair. But to take it this far! The little silver-haired man may have flung himself over the table to get to the bastard if Lexeaus hadn't grabbed him firmly by the shoulders and sat him back in his chair. He sent an icy glare No. II's way, though. A gaze that may have frozen even Axel. And that was saying something.

Xigbar just snickered to himself and cut swiftly into his steak.

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Reviews Are Love!~

Oh, and when Zexion said "What. Is. This!?" I couldn't help but yell "THIS. IS. SPARTAAA!" xD


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